Thesis Statement Board - 2nd Period - Hutchison

2/10/2020

Post your thesis statement rough draft here before 12:00am tonight. I will post my comments Wednesday so that you can make the appropriate adjustments. You are NOT required to read and comment on other's thesis statements at this point.

PROMPT: To what extent and in what ways did European powers develop different patterns of colonization in N. America? Support your answer with specific and relevant historical information from the period 1607 to 1754.

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132 Comments

Lauren Sheldon

2/10/2020 10:32:46 am

Although the European powers all sought to obtain wealth in North America, they all had a different presence in the new world, as the English focused more on colonization, the French focused more on fur trading, and the Spanish focused on obtaining gold and other materials.

Kenaan

2/11/2020 09:26:57 am

One sentence ✅
Where does your comparison fall?
Counter point was a why and not about specific similarities or differences.

Lauren Sheldon

2/11/2020 10:19:26 am

Although it could be argued that all the European colonies were built up through funding by their mother countries, the colonies kept themselves afloat and expanded differently by establishing different labor and economic systems.

Hutch$

2/19/2020 08:24:55 am

Simplify and clarify your language.

Katerina Slaughter

2/10/2020 10:35:50 am

Though all European nations colonized North America by taking advantage of of Native Americans, such as the enslavement of native people in the Caribbean and North America, the different patterns of colonization existed as some countries were motivated by economic and religious which then led to different trade and culture to emerge.

Torrin Lamb

2/11/2020 09:31:07 am

To what extent? Also might want to look at grammatical errors (economic and religious in terms of the sentence). Also might want to restructure it in a way that instead of motives for colonization it shows how they did. You still should be able to use religion, trade, economics and culture.

Katerina Slaughter

2/11/2020 10:17:37 am

Though all European nations seem to be similar in their use of races outside their own, such as the used of African American slaves and exploitation of Native America’s, there were more differences especially in regards to economic labor models and the relationships developed with Native Americans.

Hutch$

2/19/2020 08:26:02 am

Simplify and clarify your language. Counterpoint and first main point overlap a lot, try rephrasing one of them.

Ryley McGaughey

2/10/2020 03:09:13 pm

Although European powers developed similar labor systems such as slavery and indentured servitude, European powers developed very different patterns of colonization in terms of trade, economic development, and religious preferences/relationships with the church.

Aidan Joiner

2/11/2020 09:30:52 am

Did not specify the extent of her position and she did specify how each of the factors affected colonization.

Ryley McGaughey

2/11/2020 06:04:00 pm

Although European powers developed similar labor systems such as slavery and indentured servitude, European powers developed patterns of colonization that were more different than similar in terms of trade, economic development, and religious systems

Hutch$

2/19/2020 08:26:30 am

Simplify and clarify your language.

Aidan Joiner

2/10/2020 03:10:48 pm

Although many countries used similar labor systems for colonies by enslaving Native Americans, all of their patterns of colonization differed like the cooperation with Natives by the French and the enslavement of local cities by the Spanish.

Nina Song

2/11/2020 09:32:58 am

Really good thesis! Avoid using words such as “like.” Talk about countries within each main point (don’t put the countries in your thesis). Good specific counter position.

Ryley McGaughey

2/11/2020 09:35:01 am

You still need to answer the "to what extent" question. You are also contradicting your counterposition in your evidence when you talk about the "enslavement" by the Spanish so I would recommend choosing a different piece of evidence. I would also take out "like" and use a more sophisticated term. But overall it was a pretty good thesis.

Aidan Joiner

2/11/2020 10:17:16 am

Although many countries used similar labor systems such as slavery and indentured servitude, each colonizing country used fundamentally different techniques to colonize such as total capture of native cities and cooperation with local tribes.

Hutch$

2/19/2020 08:27:15 am

Your main points are really just one thing: relations with native nations. You need another one or two main points.

Manasa Tandri

2/10/2020 03:13:56 pm

Although all European powers had similar motives of god, gold and glory to pursue exploration to the Americas, the patterns of colonization set up vastly different societies, dependent on religion as seen in the Quaker settlement in Pennsylvania, economic aspects such as fur trading by the Dutch and French, and the urge to expand and gain land as seen by the British colonists and tobacco farming.

Hutch$

2/19/2020 08:28:31 am

Your counterpoint should be a way they colonized, not a why. You main points need to be categories in which you can compare all nations, not phrased as the way one nation did it.

Kyra Dalbo

2/10/2020 03:25:15 pm

While patterns of colonization and conquering of North America may be seen as similar through their methods of settling land, the patterns could not be more different due to their governments, reasons for colonization, and interactions with Native Americans.

Sai Sanjana Sukhavasi

2/11/2020 09:32:36 am

This is a great start to a thesis statement, but here are ways to improve:
Express how similar the patterns of colonization were
The argument word/ phrase could be better
Include how they colonized North America instead of why they colonized North America.

Kyra Dalbo

2/11/2020 10:00:27 am

While patterns of colonization in North America may be seen as similar through their land expansion strategies, the patterns were moderately more different due to their labor systems instituted, religious systems put in place, and methods of relating with Native Americans.

Hutch$

2/19/2020 08:28:49 am

Good

Rebecca Robinson

2/10/2020 03:58:33 pm

Despite separate European powers having many similar qualities in colonization patterns such as the driving forces behind colonization, the outcomes from key distinctions led to vastly different outcomes, such as the amount of religious intolerance, what trade blossomed, and which cultures were most dominant in each of the new colonies.

Sophia Ponomarenko

2/11/2020 09:26:28 am

Really good main points. “Driving forces behind colonization” is not specific enough, make sure it’s not a “why” but a “how”. After “key distinctions” I would state again that you’re referring to the patterns of colonization: “key distinctions in patterns”.

Rebecca Robinson

2/11/2020 10:19:10 am

Despite separate European powers having many similar qualities in colonization patterns, such their use of indentured servants and slaves for labor, key distinctions led to vastly different strategies of colonization, such as the amount of religion present, how and what trade blossomed, and which cultures were dominant in the movement into North America.

Hutch$

2/19/2020 08:30:06 am

"cultures" is not really a "way" that they colonized. Also, rephrase the religion point to be clearly a way they they used religion to colonize.

Zander Selleseth

2/10/2020 05:06:05 pm

Although different European powers developed colonies and outposts in the New World with many similar aspects, such as established organized trade with their mother countries, many patterns of colonization throughout North America were vastly different in terms of established religion, primary industry, and demography.

Lauren Sheldon

2/11/2020 09:26:00 am

It’s one sentence, which is good. You also address the correct historical skill by making a comparison. You assert your POV very well. You also recognized a specific counter position. Furthermore, you did include two to three clear and appropriate categories of analysis. However, you didn’t answer the actual question, because you didn’t address HOW they developed. All in all, very nice! Gold star!

Zander Selleseth

2/11/2020 10:17:19 am

Although European powers utilized some similar methods of colonial development, such as the use of privately-owned joint stock companies, many patterns of colonization in North America were mostly different in regards to the specific groups sent to establish colonies, the formation of religious communities, and their relations with indigenous people.

Hutch$

2/19/2020 08:30:36 am

Good

Nihar Thakkar

2/10/2020 06:03:25 pm

Although European powers had similar motives when colonizing North America such as economic gain, European powers used different methods of colonization from one another in regards to types of economic activities, tolerance of religion, and use of slave/indigenous labor.

Nick Perry

2/11/2020 09:26:09 am

Asserts a point of view, but doesn’t talk about the systems used by empirical powers to colonize the Americas.

Anuksha Madhan

2/11/2020 09:27:51 am

-1 sentence
-Speaks more about what not how
-Does use comparisons
-Asserts a point of view
-Recognises a specific counter point
-Includes three main points

Nihar Thakkar

2/11/2020 03:50:46 pm

Although European powers were similar in their establishments of labor systems, they moderately differed in the types of economic systems used, roles of religions, and various formations of labor outputs.

Hutch$

2/19/2020 08:31:09 am

The last main point it too similar to the counterpoint.

Kaela Belingon

2/10/2020 06:22:50 pm

Though the different European powers developed their colonies with similar motives such as power and economic benefit, each of their colonies developed different patterns of influencing the people to move and the colonies to evolve, such as religious freedom, personal profit, and land ownership.

Eli Bivona

2/11/2020 09:28:18 am

Change “with similar motives” to “by similar means”. Get rid of power because power is a goal not a pattern. Second half change to patterns not goals. Difference in types of economy and institutions.

Kaela Belingon

2/11/2020 10:23:12 am

Though the different European powers initially developed their colonies in similar ways such as using power and strength to establish land claims, they developed in significantly different patterns in terms of the their colonies’ religious tolerance, forms of economic industry, and labor systems.

Hutch$

2/19/2020 08:32:24 am

Counterpoint is a bit weak as written...try violence or conquest.

Sai Sanjana Sukhavasi

2/10/2020 06:26:39 pm

Although all the European powers established colonies in North America to expand their country's horizons, all of them had different ways of developing their industry, different views on religious tolerance, and different labor systems they used.

Kyra Dalbo

2/11/2020 09:29:18 am

This is a good thesis but here are the ways you could improve it:
"to expand their country's horizons" is a why and not a how.
How different were the ways?
The different labor systems - used
Try to rephrase "different views on religious tolerance" to make it more about the system or the institutions they built.

Sai Sanjana Sukhavasi

2/11/2020 09:32:55 pm

Although all European powers established colonies in North America by exploiting economic development, all of them had moderately different ways of developing their industry, different laws regarding religion, and different labor systems.

Hutch$

2/19/2020 08:33:01 am

Laws on religion needs to rephrased to indicate a way they used religion to colonize.

Gabriel Da Silva

2/10/2020 06:56:51 pm

While the various European powers developed similar patterns of colonization such as a focus on spreading religion and economic profit, they all had their own unique ways of developing colonies namely labor systems, relations with native people, and economic industries.

Yogesh Koppu

2/11/2020 09:27:52 am

This is a good thesis statement as it address all the topic needed in a thesis statement as it answers all parts of the question for the most part. But to improve the thesis statement the counter argument should not provide motives or but how the different colonial powers were able to implement their methods.

Gabriel Da Silva

2/11/2020 08:19:45 pm

Some evidence may suggest various European powers developed similar patterns of colonization such as the use of religion to spread influence , of greater significance was their differences in terms of their labor systems, economic industries, and interactions with natives.

Hutch$

2/19/2020 08:33:41 am

Start with a word like "while" to fix the grammar.

Vivek Patel

2/10/2020 06:57:16 pm

Whilst Gold, Glory, and God were shared interests by European powers during colonization times, there were different patterns in commerce and profitable industries, these patterns were represented by the export of raw materials to England from English colonies and James Town colony tobacco or the French fur industry, respectively.

Logan Mallik

2/11/2020 09:27:01 am

Please don’t use the three G’s which will require the beginning to be rephrased but the second half spot on.

Vivek

2/11/2020 10:21:38 am

Whilst the common pattern of most European powers that took land from natives and justified it by religious differences during colonization time was reoccurring, there were different patterns in commerce and profitable industries, these patterns were represented by the export of raw materials to England from English colonies and James Town colony tobacco or the French fur industry, respectively.

Hutch$

2/19/2020 08:34:46 am

Simplify and clarify your language. Your main points need to be categories in which you can compare different countries, not examples of the way one nation or group did it.

Kenaan Khusayem

2/10/2020 07:01:50 pm

Though some European colonies did not rely primarily on an agricultural economy, such as Charlestown, who's economy was based on forestry and trade, most European colonies began as grounds for cultivating cash crops such as tobacco, often requiring the work of imported African slaves, indentured servants, or native captives to work on plantations.

Mattie Morris

2/11/2020 09:26:42 am

Good use of specific examples, you addressed a point of view but it was not entirely relevant to the question. You did a good job with addressing specific categories of analysis, just be sure to remain relevant to the question.

Kenaan Khusayem

2/11/2020 08:05:33 pm

While some historians may argue that European powers took similar approaches towards developing colonies such as the common usage of chattel slavery by the Spanish, Portuguese, and English, what is of more historical significance are the vastly different ways the Europeans gained and kept land claims in North America such as through conquest, and the delicate handling of relationships between colonials and natives, as well as how they maintained their economies.

Hutch$

2/19/2020 08:35:33 am

Past tense, please. Simplify and clarify your language.

Ari Ypema

2/10/2020 07:09:03 pm

Although several European powers developed colonies in North America, they differed greatly in their relationships with natives, the labor systems they established, and motives for colonization, such as wealth versus religion.

Aditya Bhatia

2/11/2020 09:28:57 am

Focus more on the “how” those patterns for colonization were developed, not on the “why” and motives

Ari Ypema

2/11/2020 10:20:24 am

Although colonization by European powers began with similar economic systems based on agriculture, they differed largely in the relationships they established with the natives, the labor systems they used, and their use of religion to expand their territories.

Hutch$

2/19/2020 08:35:58 am

Good.

Eli Bivona

2/10/2020 07:24:30 pm

although European powers had many similarities throughout the North American colonies such as establishment of religion and slavery, the differences were very prominent, from the types of industry to the differences in religion and cultural values.

Katie Carson

2/11/2020 09:30:35 am

Really good, maybe change differences in religion and cultural “views” to “institutions” because values aren’t really a way to colonize

Eli Bivona

2/11/2020 10:14:41 am

Although European colonizers used many of the same methods of colonizing such as slavery and servitude, the differences were more prominent, from the different types of industry to the types of religious institutions.

Hutch$

2/19/2020 08:36:55 am

Good, but could use stronger phrasing of the main points.

Sahil Kumar

2/10/2020 07:57:18 pm

The difference between the European powers and the colonies is that the colonies looked for wealth rather than religion; also the colonies had a very bad relationship with the people around them (the natives).

Zander Selleseth

2/11/2020 09:26:39 am

I believe you may have interpreted the question differently than intended, as you didn’t discuss the methods of colonization utilized by different European powers. Due to this, you also left out the several categories of analysis.

Sahil kumar

2/11/2020 10:19:38 am

Although the European powers and the colonies focused on spreading religion and gaining profit, the colonies used developed labor systems and had bad relations worth the natives.

Hutch$

2/19/2020 08:37:29 am

You need to add an expression of a degree of significance (ex. “of greater historical significance”). You need to rephrase for clarity.

Katie Carson

2/10/2020 08:02:13 pm

Although European powers traveled to North America for similar reasons, the ways by which they interacted with Native Americans, built their industries, and dealt with religion were different factors in their colonization of North America.

Joe Danica Inigo

2/11/2020 09:27:59 am

Your thesis statement is one sentence, so that’s great! For the counterpoint, I feel that you answered they question “Why they colonized?” instead of “How they colonized?” You did have a clear point of view, but maybe you can add the expression of degree or significance to improve your thesis. You also included great main categories! Good job!

Katie Carson

2/11/2020 08:33:55 pm

Although European powers were all aided from their country of origin, there is a difference in their patterns of colonization through, the ways they interacted with Native Americans and types of industries built.

Hutch$

2/19/2020 08:38:06 am

You need to rephrase for clarity and fix some grammar.

Anuksha Madhan

2/10/2020 08:19:34 pm

Although the European powers seeking to colonise the Americas all developed a pattern of colonisation involving the overtaking, demise, and/or enslavement of natives, all of them had various differences in their patterns of colonisation, such as in their establishment of religion and its effects, the labour systems they employed, and the predominant goals of their colonies in the Americas.

Katie Einsmann

2/11/2020 09:32:03 am

In the last part, you mentioned goals which focuses on motives and reasons for colonization. Other than that, your thesis statement covers all of the criteria.

Anuksha Madhan

2/11/2020 09:34:49 am

Revised Version:

Although the European powers seeking to colonise the Americas all developed a pattern of colonisation involving the overtaking, demise, and/or enslavement of natives, all of them had various differences in their patterns of colonisation to a significant extent, such as in their establishment of religion and its effects, the labour systems they employed, and the predominant trade systems they established in the Americas.

Hutch$

2/19/2020 08:38:59 am

Simplify your language, this is a bit too detailed and verbose.

Sophia Ponomarenko

2/10/2020 08:44:40 pm

Although the European powers' intentions all encompassed the glory of wealth, control, and beating their competitors, they all developed different patterns of colonization through economic development, implementation of labor systems, and use of available resources.

Rebecca Robinson

2/11/2020 09:26:26 am

Used the why factor (god glory and gold) instead of how
must show where you stand on the similar, dissimilar scale
be more specific!
good use of different patterns (many examples)

Sophia Ponomarenko

2/12/2020 12:14:43 am

Although the European powers' all built up their colonies based on labour systems, they all developed moderately different patterns of colonization through economic development, implementation of labor systems, and use of available resources.

Sophia Ponomarenko

2/12/2020 12:35:14 am

Final Revised***
Although the European powers' all built up their colonies based on the implementation of labour systems, they all developed moderately different patterns of colonization through their economic systems, religious development, and use of available resources.

Hutch$

2/19/2020 08:39:26 am

Good .

Nina Song

2/10/2020 08:59:31 pm

Although European powers had similar motivation for wealth and religion, the patterns for which they developed settlements to fulfill their goals varied in terms of how they conquered the land; the Spanish creating settlements on already established cities, the French depending on natives to build their settlement, and the English settling in newly undeveloped lands.

Sushmita

2/11/2020 09:30:18 am

Your thesis statement answers all parts of the question, and it has 3 appropriate categories of analysis in one sentence. However, your analysis lists what the Spanish, French, and English did, and it doesn’t address the correct historical skill.

Nina Song

2/11/2020 04:55:41 pm

Although Euorpean powers had similar methods of how they used American lands such as taking it away from the natives, the extent to which they used the lands to acheive their own goals is drastically different and varied in terms of how they used it to establish religion, wealth, and labor systems.

Hutch$

2/19/2020 08:40:22 am

Drop references to goals. Simplify and clarify your language.

Mattie Morris

2/10/2020 09:12:43 pm

Despite the similar motives of colonization such as wealth, evangelism, and recognition, the European powers differed in the way the treated natives, the sources of labour they used, and their plans for the land that they took control of.

Sahil Kumar

2/11/2020 09:27:18 am

You answered the question well with a good point of view, as well as good counter arguments.

Mattie Morris

2/11/2020 10:18:12 am

While the European powers were similar in their use of labor systems, they were more dissimilar in their religious influences on natives and their desires for the colonies they created.

Hutch$

2/19/2020 08:52:55 am

Your main points should be ways they colonized, not why’s. "Desires" is a why.

John Kenkel

2/10/2020 09:30:45 pm

Although European powers had similar motives when colonizing North America such as economic and political gain, European powers used different methods of colonization from one another in regards to various sources of labor and production, religious institutions, as well as acquiring commodities that were valued in Europe.

Casey Phelps

2/11/2020 09:25:33 am

You have a point of view, it is one sentence and I feel you have good categories, however you are missing a counter claim and could use better historical language.

John Kenkel

2/11/2020 04:47:39 pm

Although European powers had some similar motives to colonizing North America such as economic and political gain, European powers had an even greater variance in their patterns of colonization, in terms of the religious institutions and its outcomes, the types of labor systems being employed, and top-tier trade systems that they rooted in the Americas.

Hutch$

2/19/2020 08:54:24 am

Your counterpoint should be a way they colonized, not a why. Simplify and clarify your language (specifically "top-tier trade" could just be trade economies).

Katie Einsmann

2/10/2020 09:32:08 pm

Although many colonies of different European countries shared similarities within their structures and relationships, the patterns of colonization from these countries differed from their motives, whether it was for economic or religious reasons

Nihar Thakkar

2/11/2020 09:32:00 am

One sentence is good, don’t talk about motives, in counterpoint talk about patterns of colonization, have 2-3 points to support assertion

Katie Einsmann

2/11/2020 10:18:06 am

Although all of the European nations were similar by their establishment of economic systems, they differed profoundly in how they established and relied on religious institutions and labor systems

Hutch$

2/19/2020 08:55:10 am

Good..

Tyler Jin

2/10/2020 09:32:19 pm

While different European countries developed colonies with similar labor systems, such as chattel slavery and indentured servitude, countries shared various differences in the patterns of colonization, especially in the following areas: religion, trade networks, primary economies, and demographics.

Tyler Jin

2/11/2020 10:23:25 am

While different European countries developed colonies with similar labor systems, such as chattel slavery, and indentured servitude, and trade structure, countries had various differences in their patterns of colonizations, especially in the areas of religion, primary economies, demographics, and social class.

Hutch$

2/19/2020 08:56:11 am

Pick one counterpoint and save the examples for the body paragraphs. Narrow your main points to three. You need to add an expression of a degree of significance (ex. “of greater historical significance”)

Tyler Jin

2/22/2020 08:54:09 pm

While different European countries developed colonies with similar labor systems, such as chattel slavery, of greater historic significance is the differences in their patterns of colonization, especially in areas of religion, primary economies, and societal structure.

AnnaGrace McCall

2/11/2020 09:05:42 pm

The beginning part of this thesis statement discusses the why, not the how as to how colonies in Northern America developed between the specific time period.

Yogesh Koppu link

2/10/2020 09:47:15 pm

Although most European colonies shared similar motives and ideas such as the spread of religion and power in the new world, there means of reaching this esteemed status of glory was achieved in a different manners between the colonial powers where notable differences in government, labor systems, longevity, and religion.

Gabriel Da Silva

2/11/2020 09:29:48 am

This thesis lacks proper grammar along with the fact you focused on more of the whys rather than the hows of colonization of Europeans. An example of this is when you mentioned the differences in religion in your categories of analysis and counterpoint. You followed the formula of a thesis but just need to change the content of your thesis to answer what the question was asking for.

Yogesh Koppu

2/11/2020 09:12:43 pm

Although evidence suggests that the European Colonial powers colonized by using religion to gain influence and similar labor systems, there methods of colonization varied quite drastically where notable differences are in government, religious institutions, and treatment towards native people.

Hutch$

2/19/2020 08:59:17 am

Choose one of your counterpoints and drop the other. "Their, not "there." Drop "where notable differences are."

AnnaGrace McCall

2/10/2020 10:22:21 pm

Though many European powers were similar in their reasons for the creation of colonies concerning religious expansion and imperialism, regional attributes of local resources determined the diverse organization of colonial structure and labor markets surrounding occupations and focuses such as servitude, lumber, fisheries and pelts.

Tyler Jin

2/11/2020 09:31:48 am

Try to avoid discussing the reasons of the patterns of colonization in the counter-argument. The argument is really strong, and includes good points.

AnnaGrace McCall

2/11/2020 09:10:49 pm

Although many European countries colonized the Americas with similar focus on trade and indentured servitude, regional resources that were local and attainable to the colonies shaped the diverse organization of the colonial structure of labor market and surrounding occupations such as pelting, fisheries, lumber markets, and various crops.

Hutch$

2/19/2020 09:01:36 am

You need three different main points. Right noe you have one: economic activities. You need to save the specific examples for the body paragraph and in the thesis just list your main points, ex: economic activities, main point 2, and main point 3.

Aditya Bhatia

2/10/2020 10:57:36 pm

Though most European powers aimed to colonize North America, their differing motives, such as religion, economic expansion, and imperial expansion led to the development of different patterns of colonization.

Ari Ypema

2/11/2020 09:28:58 am

Counterpoint doesn’t provide specific examples or degree of significance, thesis lists motivations, not patterns. Point of view isn’t clear.

Aditya Bhatia

2/11/2020 11:53:43 pm

Though most European powers colonized North America with similar social classes, their patterns of colonization differed in their labor systems, relationships with natives, and government.

Hutch$

2/19/2020 09:02:26 am

Social classes is not really a way they colonized, just a who. You need to add an expression of a degree of significance (ex. “of greater historical significance”)

Logan mallik

2/10/2020 10:59:06 pm

Although many people may believe that all colonies are the same in ways like reasons for colonizing, being religion, wealth, or glory the means in which they achieved these goals was very different depending on the countries and people involved in the colonization efforts such as slaves, natives, servants, and colonizers.

Vivek

2/11/2020 09:26:22 am

Logan, your thesis is good just rephrase your counter claim and take out the three g’s. Also change goals to something that relates to how there patterns were different instead of why.

Logan mallik

2/11/2020 03:44:21 pm

Although the means in which colonization occurred and the trends between countries in their quest for expansion were very similar to one another each country had its own unique pattern of colonization, from the French who focused on relationships with the natives and a strong fur trade to the English who conquered the natives in order to use their land as a place to profit off cheap labor and expensive cash crops.

Hutch$

2/19/2020 09:03:57 am

Simplify and clarify your language. Less fluff. Your counterpoint needs to be more specific. Main points need to be categories in which you will compare all nations, not specific ways one nation did it.

Joe Danica Inigo

2/10/2020 11:11:23 pm

Though most European powers colonized North America for similar motives, there was a great extent to how the European powers developed different patterns of colonization in North America, such as based on religion, trade, freedom, and more.

Kaela Belingon

2/11/2020 09:27:13 am

- needs to answer how, not why (for counterpoint)
- needs specific example of counterpoint
- good assertion of point of view
- good categories for main points
- answered all parts of question

Joe Danica Inigo

2/11/2020 09:00:28 pm

Although most European powers colonized North America with similar labor systems, the ways in which the European powers colonized North America were primarily different, especially in interactions with native populations and role of religion in society.

Hutch$

2/19/2020 09:04:25 am

You need to add an expression of a degree of significance (ex. “of greater historical significance”).

Torrin Lamb

2/11/2020 08:27:03 am

While all big European empires got into colonization, many differed when and how they colonized greatly in regards to how they utilized land, how much influence/power they asserted, and their relationships with native civilizations.

Katerina Slaughter

2/11/2020 09:30:15 am

The thesis is one sentence. It talked about why there was colonization, which is not part of the question. Does answer the question. Point of view was that they differed greatly. There was not a specific counterclaim; the counterclaim was very vague. There were three clear points. Main points were ways and did not include countries.

Torrin Lamb

2/11/2020 10:19:06 am

While all big European nations such as England, Spain, France and Portugal forced themselves onto native land to colonize, many differed when and how they colonized greatly in regards to how they utilized land, how much influence/power they asserted, and their relationships with the native civilizations.

Hutch$

2/19/2020 09:04:57 am

You need to rephrase for clarity.

Casey Phelps

2/11/2020 09:31:22 am

Although European powers colonized North America with the same hopes of finding wealth, these different powers sought wealth in different ways such as, colonizing for trade and wealth, religion, or to help maintain influence.

Hutch$

2/19/2020 09:06:49 am

Your counterpoint and main points should be ways they colonized, not why's ("hopes" is why, as is "sought wealth in," "colonizing for," etc.).

Nicholas Perry

2/11/2020 11:56:27 am

Although many of the European empirical powers used many of the same labor systems such as indentured servitude and slavery, the differences between these empirical powers were more distinguishable, from the different industries that inhabited the colonies to the religious institutions.

Hutch$

2/19/2020 09:08:24 am

"Imperial," not "empirical." Simplify and clarify your language.

Sushmita Hari

2/11/2020 09:31:31 pm

Although all European powers have colonized North America, they all had very different motives in colonizing North America, such as the Spanish wanting gold and silver, and the French and Dutch interested in fur trading.

Hutch$

2/19/2020 09:10:17 am

Past tense, active voice, please ("colonized," not "have colonized"). Your counterpoint needs to be more specific. Your main points should be ways they colonized, not why’s. Main points should be categories in which you will compare all colonies, not a list of =they way one colony did it.

Thesis Statement Board - 2nd Period - Hutchison

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